All the thoughts that flow through me, that cause anxiety, or disruption of peace to arise. I have so many things I want to say, but I have so much doubt and resistance to saying them out loud and releasing them into the world. One, because I so want things to change, and for more of us to wake up from this loop we find ourselves stuck in; and two: that they will be ignored or ridiculed and dismissed. Just critiqued and criticized; picked apart because it is easier for us to resist and reject what makes us uncomfortable, or question the status quo. Which we may have been, and are, willing participants; and if we start to reflect and interrogate all the norms that we have agreed to, then we are also questioning ourselves, and we don’t want to be guilty of being the cause of so much harm and pain and injustice that exist. The reason we resist doing that is because we have been trained to see things in the binary: good/bad, right/wrong, black/white; so you don’t have the freedom to be the complex multifaceted being that we all are. This is why we are so divided right now; it is either my way, which is right, or the other way which is wrong. Why can’t they just be different? If asked as individuals what we think or how we feel about a thing, we are much more able to discuss with nuance and objectivity, and we will also find that we are in much more agreement and alignment on many topics than we are at odds. Or, the parts on which we do disagree are much smaller, and don’t make as much difference to reaching a viable solution and reconciliation as we are made to believe. When everything is magnified and amplified by the 24-hour news cycle that keeps ramping up the sense of urgency and anxiety we feel. And the various social media platforms that have herded us into silos and echo chambers that feed our prejudices and fears. Which fill us with self-righteousness and certainty that what we think is the only truth that can exist, and anyone who thinks differently is an enemy, and out to harm me.

When we speak of change and how things need to change; what they need to change into, how that can look, ways it can be done. The argument and push back is that it is idealistic and unrealistic thinking; which to me is just a way of saying we are not willing to do what is needed. All things and systems that exist now were once just ideas. Some intentionally built, planned and thought out, and some, I would imagine, that developed and evolved more subtly as a result of various parts being created that morphed into the whole. Now we have been so programmed and acculturated to how things operate that the very idea that it could be different is automatically rejected and criticized into stasis.

But we are the ones who control how this life is experienced. I own that I do not have the in-depth knowledge-based understanding of how all the parts operate that maintain the system we inhabit now, but maybe that gives me the advantage of not being limited in my thinking of seeing impossible instead of what is possible. And I think so much of our limited thinking comes from the fact that we overcomplicate the most basic concepts and ideas, and make it so that we feel defeated in trying to solve and change what isn’t the most optimal. That too is being influenced by those who are running and operating the systems that are in place, and fear losing what they have gained by the status quo. It’s the zero-sum mentality that keeps us from experiencing what could be a more equitable and balanced and peaceful way of existing. The mentality that in order for me to have I must take, and that if others get to have, then I must by contrast lose. And that is fueled by how we are trained and programmed to want things. That the more material objects you possess, the more that represents your level of happiness, value, and worthiness.

And this system has operated and been justified for so long that it has been normalized as how things should be. That to want something different is to be disruptive and threaten the way of life that we are comfortable living, at least those whose needs are being met by maintaining things as they are. We ignore the feeling of discomfort we feel when we are confronted with others suffering, or obvious injustice. We look for ways to justify why this is acceptable, why the ownness is on the individual; that it’s only their fault that they are having that experience. We numb by reaching for our phones or other means of distraction; either to find ways to support our belief of why this is as it is, or using them to escape into a world we find more palatable and familiar.  

The more we put our heads down and continue with the as is, the more we create to keep this reality our lived experience.

Everything we experience is all about the relationships we are participating in, consciously and unconsciously. You don’t have the option or choice to not participate, however, you can choose at which level of consciousness you participate. And if this sounds familiar to anyone reading, I’m channeling my Marianne Williamson. I’ve listened to, and am now influenced by, many spiritual teachers and teachings. So, yes, my perspective is heavily informed from those places of thought, which I think is what this time calls for, and what is needed. Not in some conceptual way of theory and philosophical contemplation, though contemplation is how we begin to reframe what has been the normalized operating system, but in a practical, actualized, participatory, cooperative symbiosis that allows us to grow and evolve into the next iteration of human and humanity.

There seem to be so many things we have to contend with: climate change, social injustice, racism, prison reform, discrimination in a multitude of iterations and spaces, sexism, ablism, agism-many isms. The human mind did not evolve to be aware of and have to think about so many things. For thousands of years, we lived in small insulated communities. Now we live in the entire world, all at once. With access to all that is happening no more than a finger swipe or keystroke away. And everything is given a sense of urgency and immediacy. We form an opinion of a thing in seconds. We take a stance of for or against a thing when we’ve only been aware of it for five minutes, though where it has happened and those who are directly affected may have years and decades in which this has been materializing. And now we want it solved and resolved in a matter of hours or days. We think life is this linear and continuous event, that fits neatly into a 1,2,3,4 sequence. But if we continue to be separated from the internal, spiritual aspect of us, we will continue to experience these external manifestations of that disconnect.

And this is not just woo woo, airy fairy talk or thinking, this is how I see things to be. Does that mean it is so, or the only way, not necessarily, but it is what feels true to me and for me. I sometimes offer things with the caveat that this is my understanding, but I don’t know it to be true. Because as I say in discussions, I believe in the possibility of anything. Which leaves me open and available to being corrected, expanded, unattached to any position, and not have my identity attached to, or defined by what I think. And I purposely use the word think where I could have said believe, because having a belief is sometimes what keeps us stuck and unable to grow and evolve. A belief is just a thought that you keep thinking, but if you think it so rigidly that it restricts you from being able to think anything different it can be a harmful or destructive belief, to yourself and, or others. I get these truisms from my being able to listen to and hear others perspectives. The ability to try to hold curiosity and interest as my guidepost of how to experience another person or thought.

I do not discount or ignore the very lived experiences and reality of those who are living within the things I named previously. There are things that need to be addressed with urgency and expediency. What I can only ask is that we start to also consider that what is needed is not just the traditional way of doing, and that the possibility of more be explored. That we truly can have a more harmonious experience of life and each other. That we can see ourselves and one another as the Divine beings we are. That if we begin to explore these possibilities, what might we create and change to support this planet, and the gift of living this experience we get to have every day.

I do not put this out into the world easily. This causes much discomfort and resistance to rise within me. But, I think, and feel I have to do this. Why have I lived the experiences I’ve lived? Why have I been directed to the things I have? Why have I found alignment with the teachers and teachings that have expanded me and activated my growth? And not just for myself, but ideas and thoughts that come in and through me that seem to want to be dispersed beyond just my knowing. I get a tightness in my throat, to the point that I feel almost strangled. I don’t know how these thoughts will be received. I know there is the possibility that they may be reduced to one line or word, and how they may be manipulated, taken out of context, or mis interpreted. But to continue to hold all this is much more diminishing to me being the highest expression of myself and the Divine. If I choose to let my idea and image of self; and giving the desire for acceptance of that self more importance than my why, it is as if I am choosing to ignore the Universe and the gift I have been given of experiencing this life fully.

I only ask that if there is discomfort or resistance that comes up, that you pause and ask: Why? Why does this make me uncomfortable or cause anger? Because you can disagree with something without there being anger attached. That is a lesson for us to study and contemplate. How to express with neutrality and equanimity?

My offering for you to consider. Namaste, Ase.